Why "How Was School?" is a Dead-End (And What to Ask Instead)

If you have kids, you know the script.

They walk in the door. You ask, "How was school?" They mumble, "Fine." End of scene. You hit a dead-end.

We do the same thing with money. We wait for "teachable moments" that rarely come, or we lecture them when they ask for cash. The result? The "Money Silence."

If you’ve been following me for a while, you know this is my obsession.

But recently, I realized that just "blogging about money" wasn’t enough. My background is in Operations—I build systems that make businesses run efficiently. When I looked at my own family, I realized we needed a system, not just good intentions.

That is why you see a new name on the website today: MagniFI Your Life.

I rebranded because we are moving beyond basic tips. We are building a Financial Operating System for high-achieving families. We are magnifying the focus on legacy, capability, and financial independence (FI).

And the first step in that operating system? The Dinner Table.

The Family Boardroom

We started the money talk when the kids were 5, 7, & 9. They're never too young when you use age-appropriate terminology

Dinner is the only time most families are captive together. It is the boardroom of your "Family Inc."

If the only time you discuss finances is when your teen wants $20 for the movies, the conversation is already transactional. You are the ATM; they are the customer. It is an adversarial negotiation.

You have to break that dynamic before the ask. You need neutral ground.

But talking about money is awkward (at first). Most of us don't know where to start without sounding like we are giving a lecture on "the value of a dollar."

(Cue eye roll: "Thanks, Boomer.")

The Solution: Curiosity, Not Correction

If "How was school?" is a dead end, here's what to ask instead.

I curated a list of questions designed to bypass the awkwardness. These aren't quizzes. There are no right answers. They are designed to reveal how your children think about value.

Try asking this tonight: "If you found $100 today, what is the first thing you'd do with it?"

Then—and this is the hard part—just listen.

Don't correct them ("No, you should save half!"). Just listen.

✨Do they spend it on candy? (Short-term thinker)

✨Do they hoard it? (Fear-based thinker)

✨Do they give it away? (Social thinker)

I actually have one of each. (Yes, really).

Once you know how they think, you know how to teach them. You and I already know that one size definitely does not fit all when it comes to kids.

Get the Full List (Free)

I have put together a printable guide: Dinner Table Discussion Starters.

It covers 4 key categories to help you navigate these talks, including specific questions like:

• Philosophy: "Can you make more money? Can you make more time? (What is a constrained resource?)"

• Income: "What is the difference between active and passive income?

• Budgets: "Does our family have to give money to Uncle Sammy? Are taxes good or bad?"

• Kids & Spending: "Have you ever bought stuff you later wished you hadn't?"

It’s the "sticky stuff" that holds your family's financial values together.

Download the Discussion Starters

I am constantly adding to this list as my own kids grow and the world changes. If you haven't already, download the starter set now. Comment below to let me know which question generates the most spirited discussion at your table.

I'd love to hear it.

Cheering you on,

Stephanie Lennon

Founder, MagniFI Your Life

Previous

Next

---

Stephanie Lennon is the author of Family Bank Blueprint, GoldQuest, and What Would Water Do? Simple Strategies for Navigating Life's Obstacles. Her titles are available in Paperback and Kindle on Amazon.com.

Follow Stephanie on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, & Amazon.